Beside Himself

Until you know yourself, you can’t hope to step outside yourself.
Is this madness? So very many claim to be objective, or claim to strive for objectivity. Is it even possible? I assert it is possible only in a limited sense. The greatest barrier to what little is possible is refusing to be objective with the self first.
Over the years, as I played the role of counselor, the whole mission could be summed up in helping people face reality, to recognize fantasy for what it is, and embrace however much of reality as comes within the reach of the individual. In order counsel others, I first had to be in the habit of discarding my own fantasies. The task is never done, but you have no hope if you can’t internalize the habit of seeking out those blind spots. A mystical commitment to truth means nothing if you can’t find even a sliver of operational truth.
That operational level of truth is really all we have. I count it a fantasy to expect the full truth to be in human reach. What we need is just enough to face our own individual reality. You don’t need to learn how to fly if you spend all your time tunneling and mining in the earth. Writing a few books on my own search would prove somewhat pointless, but encapsulating those few threads of my own experience which seem to be common is the basis for my claim to counsel.
I can’t stand to see people suffer needlessly, but I’ve learned long ago you are the only one who can set you free, in a certain sense. If what I share doesn’t touch you, then I have to let it fall to the ground, wither and die. If my ranting and mumbling amuse you, there is at least that. If they strike a chord of recognition, stick around; I may have something useful to say. Otherwise, make your own path. Let me at least assure you it can be done.
Whether that path is Utopia (literally “No Place”) or Eutopia (“Good Place”) is what you have to decide. Choose your vision; do this intentionally. Refine it forever. Question all things you have been told until you begin finding yourself in the jumble, then stay at it. That’s the real objective, because you can’t be objective otherwise. You can’t hope to compare the vision of others with reality if you don’t find at least something reliably “real” for you. You can’t help others discern a method until you have a working method yourself.
All I can offer is what I’ve found. I can’t even offer that if I haven’t been through the finding process. I realize I can’t possibly know what I am, and I surely discovered long ago I can only sometimes do what I think I should. So it’s not a question of being nor really of doing, but more of who I am. I am the sum of my commitments, the collection of things from which I cannot escape. There is just enough commonality among us humans we can certainly share some things. When I have a good idea who I am, only then would I be in a position to evaluate some measure of that common experience.
Who are you? Pleased to meetcha.