Hiatus

You could use this as an open line post and ask whatever questions you like. I promise I’ll answer, and maybe even turn something important into another blog post itself. However, I am announcing a hiatus in posting for the most part. Any explanation I offer won’t make sense to anyone but me, and I’d rather not bore you with silly personal details for which there is no way to provide sufficient context.

On another note, I’m seriously praying about getting a job. I suppose ideally it would be something along the lines of courier, but I’m open to things I’ve not considered already. At any rate, it wouldn’t be any kind of government courier work because they aren’t taking applications.

Meanwhile, we are fighting severe cold weather here. There will be record lows in the next few days here and it eats up a lot of time working around that. When it’s that cold every year, the infrastructure is usually in place already and it’s no big deal. I grew up in Alaska, so it’s not the snow and cold; it’s the complete lack of accommodations in place for it. This is Oklahoma where dropping much below freezing is pretty rare in the first place, but by tomorrow sunrise we expect to see around 6°F (-14C). We also expect lots of problems associated with ill preparation for such.

I can’t give a date of expected return, but I don’t imagine it will be more than a few days.

Addenda: I forgot to mention you should keep your eyes on the financial news. Things are very unstable in the markets all over the world and this is not a good time to be invested in conceptual wealth.

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Generic Post

It’s not as if I have nothing to say; I have too much to say. Unfortunately, most of it has been covered already.

Something haunting me frequently these days is the constant confusion between human justice constructs and God’s divine justice. Jesus said that we should treat each other as neighbors by default, but it bore a huge implication utterly missing in Western social mythology. In ancient Hebrew society, your neighbor was presumed to be a relative in effect if not in fact. In order to maintain the justice of social stability, you must have a tribal social structure. If your neighbors aren’t blood relations, you have to swear some kind of covenant to bring them under the covering of God’s justice. It’s utterly foreign and even repulsive to Westerners that we are required by God to live that way.

Western secular society presumes just the opposite. It’s considered weird and almost dangerous to live among your kinfolks. Here in the U.S. we disparage that sort of thing, but God’s entire revelation assumes it is necessary for His blessings. It’s taken for granted that you would naturally want such a life. Only in recent human history has any part of human society not assumed your neighborhood was all related. Outsiders were supposed to mind their own business. If they insisted on coming into the area, they were subject to all sorts of snooping and suspicion. No outsider had any business attempting to assert significant control over your daily life. That is how God intends us to act; anything else is rejecting His Word.

So I’ll say it again: Not a single Western government is approved by God. If you want to claim Christ, you have to reject all current secular government and law. Not in the sense of fighting and making trouble, but in the sense you know better than to suggest any part of our current Western government reflects God’s revelation. It’s a filthy, nasty and blasphemous insult to God to even think that way.

Yet Our Savior died on the Cross — that’s how we handle evil human government. We start by not taking seriously any part of this human plane of existence. The only thing on this level that matters is living by God’s Laws and reaping however much power and blessing it brings. At times it must inevitably bring us into conflict with people and powers on this earth, but we expect that. We expect to die sooner or later, and should be surprised when non-believers leave us alone.

I once explained that the only proper understanding of Satan was as God’s appointed lictor and jailer. Those who reject God’s message are handed over to Satan for discipline. There is precious little requiring Satan to uniformly treat all his captives as they might deserve. Does it surprise anyone Satan would prefer to keep at least some of his captives? Why would he not wisely make the whole thing confusing by allowing some of his charges to live a long, prosperous and peaceful life? In a broad general sense, those most tormented are folks over whom Satan has least control. If you really aren’t his property, he’s going to make sure you get the worst he has to dish out. If he’s pretty sure he can keep you under his control, why mess with you?

So this business of the blessings of the Laws of God is pretty hard to calculate from the human angle. We cannot see what goes on in the Spirit Realm negotiations as we were allowed to see in the story of Job. That part of the narrative is representative, since such things are impossible to describe literally in human terms. The whole point should be obvious when you eliminate what can’t be true: Living in God’s justice is its own reward. If you don’t love the Laws of God for their own sake, nothing in them will ever have meaning to you. That’s why I say “Law is Grace” — the path to the Spirit Realm is death in this realm. The Law comes down to us from Above and is our first taste of eternity. If your moral senses are dead, you can’t taste the sweetness.

How many ways do I have to say it? We aren’t interested in fighting human governments. Go ahead and take that government job, but bring the full holy cynicism of Christ. If your moral senses are comfortable with that job, then perform it with a clear conscience and do it as best you are able. That is the most powerful witness you’ll ever have; being upright and without the typical venality of most government employees. Of course you see through the lies, but you perform as if God signed your paycheck. We are not in the business of changing the world, only ourselves. We are not responsible for making others behave well. Rather, we fully anticipate at least a certain minimum of corruption; we never bat an eye. But we do not participate willingly ourselves.

Yep, just another generic post of the same old stuff, expressed one more time with a slightly different angle.

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The Law Is Grace

Western Christians typically say things like, “Words mean something.” Words are not truth, nor even containers of truth. Words are, at best, mere signs pointing out a path that brings you to God. God is truth. All truth is God’s truth. Truth is merely a reflection of God and His revelation. So sometimes it’s a bit of fun to poke at Reformation or Enlightenment Christians by denying their prissy distinction between Law and Grace.

Jesus said the Law could be summed up in giving God His due as Creator and handling Creation in the same sacrificial love as He did. When the Father began revealing His love, it was through His Law. Not the Law Covenants — those were mere snapshots in time of what His divine justice looked like in some limited context. Jesus made it plain that His Father’s divine justice was quite a bit higher than the Law of Moses, and certainly far higher than the Talmud.

About the only folks in Scripture that might agree with “words mean something” would be the Pharisees. I’ve noted previously that mainstream Christianity after 300 AD reflected the success of the Judaizers and Gnostics in subverting the original faith Christ taught. Western epistemology is no less than a blatant denial of Christ. It attempts to capture and strip the life from revelation so that mankind can take authority over it using fallen intellectual reason.

The revelation of God’s divine justice was epitomized in Christ. Christ was the Law personified. Nothing He said or did was contrary to any of the Law Covenants except where those came up short. Walking in the Spirit means also walking in the spirit of the Law. I can assure you I never knew God’s power half so well as when I committed myself to walk in that truth.

Primary example: I was previously a captive slave of my appetite for food. Certain particular favorites would call my name and I was helpless to resist. As a child it was far worse; I’d even steal to get my hands on sweets. While I outgrew that level of desperation, I was still a slave to my sweet tooth, right up until a few years ago. All my efforts at iron discipline meant nothing, because sooner or later I would cave and binge.

Not so very long ago, God found me ready to hear His truth. I was struck by the realization that the Law Covenants reflected a crucial element in Creation itself. Moral truth is woven into the very fabric of the universe. If you can see moral justice and cling to it, Creation itself acts differently. Suddenly, my whole existence changed. Never mind what the world was like for me; I began finding the power within to do what I knew was right. The food cravings died before I changed any of my dietary habits. So eventually I began the long path back to fitness, and far beyond to a level of fitness I’ve never seen before. Today, at my annual doctor visit, he had nothing to say, no advice about improving anything at all because I am now in better shape than he. Everything changed when I understood what the Law Covenants were meant to do.

When God revealed His Laws, it was an act of grace. When God revealed His Son, that was grace and truth walking in sandals. Grace includes the Law and fulfills all its purpose. Embracing this will take you outside of Western Civilization. I remain ever more an alien in this Western world, not a voluntary participant. Words are just a tool to indicate something which cannot be told.

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Oppression Is Futile

It’s not that resistance if futile, but it serves no valid purpose.

That is, if you accept the revelation of Jehovah, you would realize resistance as a political principle is serving a different god. Given that most Christians read a false epistemology back into the Bible, they have no idea how wrong they are in claiming they follow Christ in their various brands of activism.

We will have more than one serious effort to assemble a global government. The stories about the NSA and friends are just a taste of what’s to come. Whether or not these various efforts can work in concert remains to be seen, but for us here at the bottom of the political food chain, it probably makes little difference. It’s an intellectual curiosity, a form of entertainment for us to watch how this plays out. In broad general terms, we know historically that such things tend to crumble from inherent weaknesses right about the point where they seem most successful. Prophetically, we know none of it matters much except in terms of our tactics.

We have no expectation or interest in changing the world. It’s not our department. We are in the business of changing people, mostly ourselves. By this we can hope to bring about at least an awareness of the joy possible for others. In this, we stand to utterly frustrate the likes of the NSA, GCHQ or any other human agency seeking to nail down precisely who we are and what we are likely to do. All their spying and intrusive snooping in our lives will offer nothing useful when God works on us. What they think they know of us becomes so much wasted effort.

God had warned me that big changes were coming. I have been actively seeking His changing hand in my life. Leading up to my attendance at jury duty this past Monday, I had seen in my spirit a looming revelation of some importance, and so it was.

With no particular clue for my intellect to claim, I simply walked through the experience as I would anything else. It would be hard to summarize the dynamics I encountered without it reading like an overwrought self-examination, but there are times that is how the hand of God seems to work. In the end, I felt like a fool, like a little boy who had called entirely too much attention to himself for things that probably weren’t that important. It’s not that anyone said anything to suggest as much; quite the contrary. It was rather the discernment of God’s wrath on my human frailty.

Quickly I realized a false self-perception. Not a lie, but something that was simply no longer true. Whether it had been true in the past was not the question. In the Spirit Realm, the question is always, “How can I serve you now, Lord?” We leave behind the past in that sense. No one pretends we can wipe it clean from our memories, but we assert that it need not control what comes after. The exercise was God’s way of telling me that in meat space I am no longer any kind of leader for the simple reason that precious few of those I encounter would be able or willing to follow. I am also no follower because no one else is going where I go. In otherwise, I belong to no social grouping of any kind.

My mission in meat space is now radically different from what I once believed. You will probably notice precious little change here on this blog, since my virtual presence is unchanged. I remain an elder of Christ and prophetic writer here. I am still one of His appointed lawyers online, but the change is in my real-world presence. While I still have little clue what this means my worldly mission might be, I know that it was a necessary preparation. The human occupation ahead of me is yet veiled.

This makes me all the more alien to most humans, but especially so to anyone with a Western mind. The entire orientation of what I do in the flesh has changed, and my apparent personality is already quite different. Now, precious few have any business seeing my inner self. The list of things to which I am likely to react visibly has narrowed considerably. Should anyone notice me at all, it must be a matter of my mission alone, not any of the other common markers of humanity. My mission requires I be otherwise invisible.

Don’t confuse this with the mechanical presentation of a Spock from Star Trek. That in itself is highly noticeable. I am to become mere background, frankly avoiding betraying any form of uniqueness. “Pay me no mind; I’m not here.” That is, until the Spirit of the Lord calls me to whatever action pleases Him. I am the household servant whose very mission perishes in the bright light of notice. What this does is raise the threshold, sorting out those who can benefit little from what I might have to teach. Unless they are moved by the Spirit of God, they aren’t likely to ask me anything. This is very much as it should be.

By no means would I pretend this is a model for you, in the sense I hold this forth as the single best way to pass through this world. Rather, it is the intent to discover my path that should indicate yours is out there somewhere. At the same time, the utility should be obvious, in that this represents a significant barrier to anyone building a dossier on me. So much as a videotape of my behavior at the county courthouse will offer a jarring difference from what you’d see now. I’ve been practicing hard and implementing all the changes this calls forth. Without being very close to me for a long portion of my life, you wouldn’t know me now. Human identity is fungible; this is the hand of God on me.

I don’t have to plan resistance to the foibles of human oppression; they will fail on their own limitations against the Kingdom of Heaven.

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Job 25

For once, Bildad reveals what he actually knows, not what he merely thinks. In this very short chapter, he states two inarguable truths. God is ineffable; His position and power are beyond telling. At the same time, mankind is in no position to argue with God.

Gone are the accusations against Job and the feeble direct logic. He says nothing more.

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Unreliable Reality

Up until that moment, we had been friends.

Let’s face it folks: She was homely as mud pie. But she was a senior NCO in the unit’s command staff, and her influence was felt in every life attached to that military installation. A single mom in the US Army, it was a world where feminism was the law and she experienced virtually no hindrances from her gender. However, she suffered much from jokes and innuendo about how it was she might have gained her position.

In the first few encounters I treated her with the same basic kindness I used on everyone else in the world. I tossed her a verbal bone once and she acted like it was treasure. I wasn’t trying to curry favor, just acting the role I knew God had placed upon my life. It was with a genuine shepherd-like concern that I teamed up with another man to take her son on some manly outings at the one time he was most confused about life.

But duty called and by the time we were ready to continue working with him, the boy had lost interest. It wasn’t a good change. He became the proverbial troubled smart-ass punk. I won’t try to dissect who influenced whom, nor how, but his mother became a little distant, too. Not cold or hostile, just too busy for chit-chat. A lot of things were changing in that organization all at once.

Time drifted on and our organization hosted a major social event. We called in extra MPs from a neighboring organization to help with parking because it could not be left to random choice. That had been tried once before and failed chaotically. Without organizing it closely, we could not possibly maximize the limited parking space for the typical American community where just about every adult had their own car. This was in a foreign land where the bicycles outnumbered the human population and public transport was just too easily available.

She drove through where I was supervising our borrowed patrolmen in controlling the parking. Suddenly she dodged into an empty lot we were saving for later, ignoring the hand signals from one of the MPs. She came all too close to striking him with her car. I saw the whole thing; he approached her about it and she was openly hostile. Being a good bit younger and having never encountered her before, he was frankly intimidated. So he reported her reaction to me. I conferred with someone even more senior and was pretty much forced to write her a ticket. The commander later stood behind it 100%.

It was as if she were a complete stranger. I acted as if nothing had happened. For me, it was just one of those things people do when not in a better moment. But her contempt and hostility was harder and thicker than the centuries-old pavement under my feet when we passed a few days later on the street. The commander made it a point to check and make sure this gal didn’t retaliate through her official position, I later learned. Apparently she had tried it on other people. For me, it was as if someone had replaced her, and she was a stranger uglier than her own face.

Just doing my job, but she took it so very personally.

It’s not enough to look at this through standard Western analysis, nor even through Game. Looking back, that was at about the time I began my in-depth review of Ancient Near Eastern cultures and became conscious of the radical difference between that and our Western Civilization. It was just about the time the Internet exploded into the homes of average folks, and suddenly I had access to resources I had never dreamed. It was like my old college library, quite extensive in Antiquities on its own, but a hundred times larger and all on my computer. One of the signature grand accomplishments of Western Civilization will be her undoing.

Westerners understand human development and phases in human life. Yet there remains a fundamental and unconscious expectation that human identity is fixed. So very fundamental to that woman’s job was tracking personnel and career actions. If there was any one thing that advanced her career, it was her native expertise in that very occupation of managing it for others. It was her job to be obsessed with the administrivia. For her to respond to me as a dire threat to her career — her surrogate husband — was entirely normal. The tension in her life declined significantly once she managed to capture the newly divorced Command Sergeant Major as her husband. I was no longer a threat and she simply ignored me, while her son found himself under the watchful eye of a very manly man. She turned out to be a model devoted wife to this man, a woman who truly understood the professional demands on him. I’m happy for all of them, in the sense that their story for me ended there.

She would have been the first person to reject the ANE understanding that human identity is fungible, even as she benefited so much from that truth. If there is one core element of the American military bureaucracy, it is the fixation on stasis in human identity. A fat folder of papers followed me through my terms of service. Expunging anything, even the most ephemeral references, never actually happened. There was always a copy of something somewhere that was more permanent than my very existence. In military records, your file packet could only grow, and your identity was ever more fixed by the weight of the record acting like an anchor on your soul.

In Christ, you are a new person. The only memory of past folly is your own. God Himself is willing and able to discount the whole mess, and His records of you in Eternity are the truth of who you are. No entity in all Creation has standing to dispute what God says of you. Once you understand this and embrace it fully, it’s so much easier to forgive the common wounds of human conflict. I won’t hesitate to tell you that this single factor is by far the most difficult thing for Western Christians to absorb. It assumes an entirely alien approach to reality and even the very act of thinking itself.

Reality itself is fungible.

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Flooding Human Vanity

We think of vanity as a bottomless pit.

Solomon’s royal service manual (Ecclesiastes) starts out announcing that our human existence is vanity. The translation could as easily be meaningless, pointless or futile. The root meaning of the English word “vanity” is from the the Latin for emptiness, commonly used to describe someone who is self-absorbed. We know from studies in human behavior that self-absorption is the standard response to a sense of emptiness inside.

You expect that from children, who really are empty receptacles in many ways. They need to fill up the measure of self and discover who they are. It’s not as if just anything can be poured in; that’s a Western myth. Try as you might, some of what you pour into your child’s life from your own reservoir isn’t going to stay. They simply do not have the hooks to match yours, and the variations are endless. On the other hand, they would have a hard time getting something you can’t offer them.

So at some point they begin to model instinctively outside the home. The ambient culture also has limited offerings, and some social cultures are much poorer than others. Some only seem so, but that’s for another day. The whole point behind having a culture with it’s body of mythology is to provide such content, whatever it may be. The biggest problem comes when the family and culture offer a serious mismatch to the individual need.

That’s not meant to damn the culture, because some folks are pretty twisted from birth. For whatever reason, they don’t match very well to their native environment and this manifests in all sorts of issues. A primary manifestation of this mismatch is self-absorption. The individual perceives a significant sense of emptiness or hunger, often linked to a sense of insecurity. Sad is the culture that teaches people to hide this instead of trying to answer the need.

Part of the concept of vanity includes the physical equipment people use to feed their vanity. Notice I don’t suggest that it feeds the actually need, but rather keeps the vanity itself alive. We use the term “vanity” for dressing tables and other furnishings that serve a person’s vanity. In a fitness gym there are mirrors everywhere, covering whole walls from floor to over head-height. It allows people to focus on their movements for the greatest effect, in part because fitness is defined largely in terms of bodybuilding. It’s all about how the body appears, and only secondarily a matter of actual health. For example, power lifters have little use for mirrors; it’s all about the weight.

Both groups might indulge in various forms of substance abuse to gain advantages. We have people willing to take serious health risks for the sake of gaining a physical power or appearance defined by social ideals. But such mirrors have other uses.

It’s quite possible to be fulfilled enough that you have nowhere else to look but outward. A critical element in Christian belief is the image of self-denial. It doesn’t work too well as a discipline, but it’s a real treat when it reflects a change in character. The whole idea is that you really aren’t that interested in yourself because you have no burning, itching needs. Not so much that all your human emptiness is filled, but that you allow some elements of your human nature to wither and die so that you no long sense that deep hunger. There are people like that. Ever meet those weird people who don’t seem to have a care in the world? Some actually don’t have any cares.

So the gym mirrors can serve as a tool for watching others. That need not have a totally high moral objective, as anyone is likely to imagine in an environment where people wear scant clothing and tend to be working on making their bodies sexy by some standard. Still, it’s amusing to note that many of those hefting weights in front of mirrors don’t much notice others watching them in the mirror. And you can observe other behaviors that way, too. You can watch people watching others.

Most people in the gym don’t get what I’m doing. A fit appearance is an unavoidable by-product of my real aim, which is more at endurance with a measure of added power. My objective is to improve my Kingdom service, an answer to my sense of calling. I’m not holy and wonderful, but there aren’t that many who share my internal motivations. It’s best for me if folks don’t actually notice me at all, but allow me to watch them. I’m still quite alien to my environment, but I don’t feel empty, so while I’m lifting those weights a part of my mind wanders to see what others are doing.

I admit my flesh gets in on this, and there are females using the same equipment among the men. However, real humans are far more complex than any one thread of consciousness. So when I catch the fine young filly watching me, you can assume my internal reaction is not that simple. I certainly don’t assume her thoughts are all that simple, only that she pays way more attention to me than I think is warranted.

There are seriously better built men there, most of them are younger and plenty are more handsome in the face. Who knows what she’s thinking; it could as easily be that paradoxical eyes drawn to something repulsive and can’t look away sort of thing. That would be funny, not insulting to me. But I doubt it because she does speak a few polite pleasantries to me. One would hardly call it flirting. In times past, I would gush and overreact; I know what it’s like to be empty. Thank God, I’m healed of that, so I don’t pretend to myself that she wants me or anything like that. What she might want is subject to all the same complexities as any other human, and I’m not trying to figure it out. Fortunately for me, my libido has been nearly dead for some years, so it’s not something I have to fight. What she might or might not want is not the issue. What matters is how I can serve her moral needs within my calling.

That’s what I really want, and it’s what drives me in dealing with everyone else in the gym or any other place I go. I won’t lie and suggest there is no element of vanity lurking in my soul, but that I am in a good position to deny its vote in how I operate. I’ve been sensitized to it and blessed with some good understanding of how to keep it in check.

Here’s a parable: Imagine some indefinable power from outer space that comes over you, rather like an impossible to understand symbiotic life form. You know it’s there, but you know nothing about it. Over a period of time, it’s presence so changes you that your very awareness is not human by typical definitions. There are overlapping elements, but something fundamental has changed. You become the sort of person that no one can really know because you are able to calibrate and adjust to the context in ways you can’t even explain. You don’t act the same in every environment except that you are unnoticed by most people. Only a precious few even realize you are there, because they sense a hunger for that same alien influence.

Human vanity does have a bottom; it’s just that humans can’t reach it alone.

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Economics Doesn’t Exist

Economics isn’t a useful body of theory, but merely a set of observations of human behavior regarding material goods and services within a specific context.

I was certified to teach economics, one of the few public school teachers with that certification here in Oklahoma. My grades were at or near top of the class when I was in college and the professors actually wanted to chat with me about their stuff. I’ve been inside the system. I’ll tell you it is mostly stupid.

The vast majority of economic theory is based on context, a set of ideas fixed to a moment in time and space. Most of them fail to account for very real human factors as perception and reality drift beyond the context of that moment. In fact, the whole point of economics as a discipline is an attempt to change human behavior into something that economists believe is more rational and efficient with resources. In this, the discipline has failed miserably and will continue to do so because it tries so hard to ignore human nature.

There’s no problem coming up with a rough outline that tends to explain some things. It takes only a modicum of intelligence to analyze what you see. However, you cannot backtrack from your outline to generalities about what ought to be. Economics is easily the worst possible foundation for judging human behavior. It is the quintessential failure of Western Civilization, emphatically giving God the finger when He thunders about His stated plans for humanity and the universe.

Most new economic theories arise, in essence, as predatory principles that permit a handful of educated and wealthy folks to skim the excess of production. Once those principles become a general understanding, they weakness begins to show and some other brilliant mind notices. Then another analysis follows with a new set of predatory principles. Forming a theory from the principles is easily the single greatest proof that the intellect is blind to moral reality. The study of economics does affect human behavior, but never as the theory predicts. You can truculently insist your theory is right, but at some point your subconscious mind recognizes what a fool you are, or you simply prove how utterly stupid you really are.

Every economic system is fluid, and there are apparent cycles, but up to now no theory has been able to account for moral and political factors of human will and behavior. You can project your theories back over various historical contexts, but you will inevitably miss the point when you fail to grasp the moral principles that vary between civilizations and various other economic contexts. Morality is simply not recognized by any economic theory; you have to pretend there is no such thing in order to develop a theory.

Don’t trust economics as a guide to anything; use it only as a very narrow set of observations.

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I’m Tech Support

This is an exercise in mirror reading.

There is no social group for me. I’m an alien in virtually every human context, in part because I am “not of this world” (Romans 12:2) —

Even among my fellow Christians, I am way out there. Not many will work with me, and that is as it should be. Being really good at tech support requires that you operate outside the common social sphere. That’s the paradox of human social context. If you are really good inside it, you can’t be removed enough to understand too much.

In spiritual terms, “tech support” covers a lot more ground than just human technology. Humans are themselves a form of technology, if you will. Granted, most serious computer nerds are really good with computers precisely because they aren’t good with humans, but I’m more than mere computer tech support. Rather, that’s a parable for what I do in general.

Instead of being wholly incompetent with social situations, perhaps it’s that I understand them all too well from the moral point of view. I can participate well enough, but frankly I’d rather not get too much of that. I lose sight of who I am when I engage the social context itself. My calling requires that I keep my social contacts few and short. The biblical moral framework is the science/technology to which I adhere for this work. Clinging to God in His Realm means clinging less to humans in their realm.

If we shift over to the virtual world, it’s like a parallel universe: Any given personal character manifests quite differently. It’s not that I am different, but the context is different. In some ways, it’s radically different. Online I am very much a social leader, insofar as there are social leaders. That’s why I refer to myself as an online pastor/elder — only in the virtual world am I so deeply engaged directly in humans. That’s the paradox of virtual reality. We aren’t really engaged at all, in one sense, yet our contacts online do affect us very much, even in meat space. It’s not that virtual space takes so much away, as it offers something totally different than meat space. There’s an overlap in who we are, but we should remain conscious of what does not carry across.

This is why, in meat space, I would prefer jobs that don’t require much contact with humans. I’m human tech support; my whole orientation makes me most useful out of the limelight. I can lead when it’s necessary, but my orientation is support from behind the scenes. I surrender that lead as quickly as possible, and simply advise and implement decisions others make. I have to be familiar with a lot of things, but not so highly wired into any of them as to hold true expertise in those things. General competence is sufficient because it really does cover a wide span. I have to recognize expertise in others so I’ll know when to pass the buck, and how much of it to pass.

If you were to confine your ruminations to behavioral science as this world regards it, you’d get me wrong. Every personality inventory leaves me deeply frustrated because it is inherently incapable of offering anything that genuinely fits me. So while your MBTI may offer something you think you can use with me, you’ll frustrate the hell out of me and I won’t tolerate much of you. You’ll probably fail completely to understand so long as you believe in that system. You would have to come out of that silly little contraption into a much different matrix to begin seeing the reality. The complexity of our reality is not visible from within it. You can only understand it from a system designed and implemented outside this universe, from the One who designed all this and is the only One fit to judge it.

That’s the system to which I cling. It permeates our reality and explains it as fully as anything can or ever will. This is the system at which I seek expertise, and it covers an awful lot of territory. It’s not about directing your steps, but informing you of all the options and letting you take your own path.

You decide; I’ll play my part in making it happen. I’m your tech support.

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Oklahoma County Jury Duty

The county website is pretty sparse on information. Recounting my experience will provide a snapshot for early 2014.

The County Courthouse is right downtown OKC, and the maps are good enough to get you there. I was coming in from the eastern side of the county, so I took I-40. Traffic was fairly light until the merge with I-35. I drifted over and took the I-235 exit which was pretty thick and slow, but not intolerable. The simplest route for me was to drop off on Lincoln Blvd. (second exit on 235) and run north to NE 8th Street. A left turn and the street drifts back south and you can keep doing that until you hit NE 4th and cross under the railroad tracks into the city center. I ran along 4th to Harvey, cut left two blocks to Robert S. Kerr. A right turn put me right in front of the county annex and the entrance to the parking garage was down on the right. There really isn’t much reason to chase all the other parking options unless you simply have a preference. You pull in, push the button and grab a ticket and park. You don’t pay until you leave, so don’t lose that ticket.

The street crossing gives you legal priority over vehicular traffic and the lines painted on the street point you to the proper entrance. Inside, you’ll see the security station. To your right is one of those snaking paths between guides. Jurors must enter that route. You can grab a blue bowl (they call it a “tray”) men and empty your pockets. Purses and lunch bags are okay. My fanny pack went right through their X-ray conveyer. I was surprised the big framed metal detector picked up the clips on my gloves, so it’s pretty sensitive. Belt buckles and such will set it off. However, I saw folks dragging in substantial backpacks, briefcases, tablet computers, etc. through the conveyor. What they are looking for is sharp implements and weapons, not all that other stuff.

Once inside, you can wait for an elevator directly beyond the security entrance there in the main corridor that runs south. Or, you can turn down the hallway on your left and find the stair entrance half-way down on the right wall and climb five floors. Most floors have a slight drop from the annex building down to the courthouse in that wide corridor. On jury days there is a cluster of folks waiting in the elevator corridor on 5th floor, with more down near the ramp to the courthouse, but the actual jury room inside a bit. There are big double glass doors between the elevator lobby ramp down to the courthouse. Through those doors and then around a walled section to the left is a big steel door. It opens at 7:30, just as the instructions say. There’s an anteroom/hallway, then another door and a large open room with what looks like church pews. There are cushions on the seat portion.

They want you to walk along that south wall of the Jury Room to the front with your summons letter. They scan the bar code and give you a form to fill out. You can pick up a tiny golf pencil from the basket, too. You’ll need the six-digit number as your Juror Number. That’s how you get paid, by the way. They also give you a clear plastic badge sleeve. You are supposed to tear off the portion of your summons where the bar code is; it has tiny perforations for this purpose. Stick that in your badge and pin it on. You have to wear that during your entire duty time.

There was time for more folks to come in, and we had the place nearly packed at about 385, from what I overheard. With heavy coats and stuff, the place was just a little tight. The assistant in charge of this whole thing was Gail Bowlby, an older fellow who had been running it six years at that time. He uses humor to keep a relaxed atmosphere. He’ll run through a spiel, then the County Clerk, Tim Rhodes himself comes in and does his spiel. Eventually the acting Chief Judge comes in. They rotate this job monthly between some fourteen judges. It’s like a courtroom session: “All rise!” We got a badly rehearsed spiel from this judge but it wasn’t intolerable. Eventually he left.

We were informed that five judges had requested a jury pull. Each pull varied from 25-30 bodies. We were told the pay was $20/day, including any part of the day. The IRS says they can reimburse mileage at the rate of $0.56/mile both ways, as I recall, and they said something about reimbursing for parking fees. The checks are mailed a few days later. Having arrived for duty on one call, you were off the roster for five years. Should you get a summons before that, let them know and you’ll be released. A handful went home for that, plus a few others who must have convinced Mr. Bowlby they should be released for some reason. When the time comes, he starts calling the names. The computer draws them at random from the pool that has reported for duty, then alphabetizes the resulting list.

Around 9:40 the first pull was called and I was included. You really should be ready to answer to your name loud and visually. I pulled the old military thing, jumping to me feet with a firm, “Here, Sir!” He loved it. We were directed to gather in the anteroom where a bailiff waited for us. She said we could bring our drinks if they had lids. It’s probably a good idea to bring at least one lidded drink. I carried a large sport bottle with good water from home, because I hate city water. I also schlepped my lunch and coat with me, too. The bailiff led us down the stairs two flights to third floor and around and down the ramp. The ramp ends in another elevator corridor with a railing and an open view to the main foyer of the courthouse below. At the bottom of the ramp two hallways run away in opposite directions. It appeared there was a courtroom and offices on each corridor. The big fancy courtroom double doors are the first thing you see looking down those two hallways.

We had a fifteen minute break. We were told there was a coffee shop down in the foyer of each of the two buildings and smoking was outside, to include folks with e-cigarettes. The restrooms were pointed out and we wandered around in the open area there for a while.

We were called into the courtroom and told to sit in the spectator gallery first. The two parties of the case were already sitting at their tables. We came in and sat until the judge entered. Again, the ceremony of being before a judge. We were sworn in and seated. The clerk shook a box with stiff paper slips inside. Our names were on the slips. We were called until 19 were seated. I was in this group. The judge went around to each asking questions. Are you married? Do you work? Got kids? The point of the questions was to see if anything might affect our deliberations. Part of it was checking to see if you lived with anyone who might know about the case, etc.

The process of lawyers chatting with the jury pool before selection is called voir dire. It’s part science and part art. You get a feel for the attorneys and hints of what the case is about. This is your last chance to get out of jury duty by making it obvious you are biased or simply cannot bring yourself to judge at all. Anyone with a strong character is likely to be sent off simply because most trials work best with jurors who don’t know enough to have a strong understanding of the matter at hand.

Most cases take that day and maybe part of the next.

At any rate, I was dismissed and sent back to the Jury Room — pretty much what I had expected anyway. You get your name slip from the clerk and walk back on your own. You then turn in your slip to whomever is manning the desk in the Jury Room. This was around 12:15 and lunch was until 1:30. If you don’t like coffee shops, Leadership Square has a food court just a block away and there are other fast food joints nearby. I had brought my lunch.

Folks filtered back in and sat doing whatever entertained them, including several folks napping. It’s okay. By now it was probably less than a hundred still hanging around. Shortly before 3:00 PM Gail called a few names to stay, then began processing the rest of us out. We were called by sections from the seating and turned in our badges. If anyone needed a letter stating where they had been, etc., they could ask and wait for a form letter to be printed with their name on it. It was a mad dash to the parking garage and to get out of the city before traffic picked up.

The parking garage pedestrian entrance is a long foot ramp down to two pay machines. You insert your ticket, then cash in bills smaller than $20. One lady just had to try a $100-bill; no dice. Correct change works best. Folks who came early like me paid the full $8, but some must have come a bit late and only paid $6. The machine will tell you to take your ticket back and use it for an exit token. The parking garage is a bit confusing trying to leave. You drive around to the west-bound ramp up, and at halfway, turn left and back down to the exit lane. Climbing up puts you on even-numbered floors, and coming down is odd-numbered floors. There are several exit lanes where you insert your paid ticket. The bar goes up and you head out one of two exits. There is one last bar, but that raises automatically. It’s there to prevent folks coming in without passing the ticket process.

Final note: Oklahoma officially recognizes the right of jury nullification. They don’t call it that, but you’ll be informed you can, as jurors, tell the government it is wrong about the law and the judge has to go with that. Lawyers generally do not like that. Most of the people I saw stricken from a jury pool were people with strong character, outspoken leader types.

Update: The county does not reimburse for parking, but they do pay the mileage and daily duty. It took nearly three weeks.

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